So You’re Getting Your First Tattoo? Here’s What You Really Need to Know

Because it’s more than just “pick a design and show up.”

You’ve decided to get your first tattoo—congrats! You’re about to become a walking masterpiece (or at least, a human with a sick new shoulder piece). But before you head to the shop and slap some permanent art on your body, let’s have a quick, brutally honest, slightly ridiculous chat.

Here’s what to know before you get inked—for the first time ever.

1. You Will Overthink the Design

Totally normal. Expect at least five existential crises and two Pinterest spirals. One minute you want a delicate floral tattoo, the next you’re planning a full sleeve of Norse gods. Take your time. It’s going to live on your skin forever—like a very committed roommate.

2. Yes, It Hurts. But You’ll Survive.

It’s a needle. Going into your skin. Repeatedly.
Of course it hurts. But not in a “scream into the void” way—more like “annoying cat scratch that lasts an hour” kind of vibe. Breathe, don’t be weird, and bring snacks. (Pro tip: eat beforehand. Fainting is not punk rock.)

3. Your Artist is Not a Therapist

They’re here to tattoo, not help you work through your breakup. Be polite, follow their instructions, and for the love of ink—don’t ask them to copy someone else’s tattoo exactly. That’s tacky. And possibly illegal.

4. Aftercare is Everything

You just got a piece of art permanently etched into your skin. Now’s not the time to wing it. That’s why we made Tattoo Goo—a full lineup of aftercare products designed to keep your new ink looking crisp, clean, and infection-free.

You wouldn’t wash the Mona Lisa with dish soap. Treat your tattoo with the same respect. (Seriously, throw out that petroleum jelly.)

5. No Gym, Pools, or Sunbathing—Sorry

Think of your fresh tattoo like a wound that also happens to look really cool. You’ve gotta protect it while it heals. That means no chlorine, no tanning, and absolutely no sweaty spin classes (sorry, overachievers).

You’ll be back to flexing your ink poolside soon enough—but not today, Satan.

6. You Will Immediately Want Another

The rumors are true: tattoos are addictive. You’ll go from “just one” to “I think I need a full back piece of an angry koi fish fighting a dragon” in about 3–5 business days.

Plan accordingly.

Final Words of Wisdom

• Wear loose, comfy clothes (no one wants to peel off skinny jeans post-tattoo)

• Tip your artist—they just changed your life

• Don’t listen to Chad who says tattoos are bad for your soul

• And please use actual aftercare products. (That’s us. Hi.)

Welcome to the club. You’re going to look awesome.
And with the right care (aka Tattoo Goo), you’ll keep that fresh ink lookin’ like new.